A Spanish reader of NMM.org has been kind enough to translate an interview Robert Pattinson had with the Spanish newspaper El Pasi. I thought this passage was hilarious:

R.P. The worst part of it is that they are not romantic at all, they are super traumatic. Instead of excitement you feel pity for both of them [laughs]. All of it was very uncomfortable, not only because the first scene Javier [Beltran, who plays Lorca] and I shot happened only one day after we met, but also because we had no privacy while shooting them, we were surrounded by technicians who were speaking in Spanish, a language I didn’t understand, and they were giggling at us.

EP3. Who is a better kisser, Javier or Kristen [Stewart, his lover in Twilight]?

R.P. Definitely, Javier [laughs]

Check out the rest of the translated intervew after the break.

The mustache can’t fool us: Behind this young personification of Dali hides one of the most desired specimens of today’s movie industry. One year before playing the romantic vampire in Twilight, Robert Pattinson, 22, was devoted to the Mediterranean life style in Barcelona. The reason, the filming of Little Ashes, a recreation of the impossible love lived between the painter and Federico Garcia Lorca which is shown to us, for example, appearing naked next to his friend and lover under the moonlight in the waters of Cadaques [a town off the coast of the Mediterranean Sea in Northern Spain]. We caught him as he just landed in Vancouver to shoot New Moon, the second movie to the saga of Twilight by Stephenie Meyer.

EP3. What about Little Ashes caught your interest?

Robert Pattinson. It is an exceptional tragedy. I doubt I can ever again achieve such level of tragedy in my career [laughs]. I had no idea who Dali, Lorca or Bunuel were until this flick. And as I learned more about, them the more obsessed I became. Especially with Dali’s writings. Many people don’t know it but he was an amazing writer. I found out that I have many things in common with him.

EP3. For example?

R.P. He was very self conscious and very aware of how people perceived him. And he worked to manipulate that. That is something I did throughout my childhood and as a teenager.

EP3. Dali turned out to be a vampire also. What have the casting directors seen in you to keep categorizing you as one?

R.P. It is strange. During rehearsals for this movie, Marina Gatell [who plays Magdalena, Lorca’s inseparable friend] told me: “You know, you are a vampire”. I found that comment very strange and now that I think about it, I find it even more strange [laughs].

EP3. What do you think about your first sex scenes being with another man?

R.P. The worst part of it is that they are not romantic at all, they are super traumatic. Instead of excitement you feel pity for both of them [laughs]. All of it was very uncomfortable, not only because the first scene Javier [Beltran, who plays Lorca] and I shot happened only one day after we met, but also because we had no privacy while shooting them, we were surrounded by technicians who were speaking in Spanish, a language I didn’t understand, and they were giggling at us.

EP3. Who is a better kisser, Javier or Kristen [Stewart, his lover in Twilight]?

R.P. Definitely, Javier [laughs]

EP3. You have said that due to the success of Twilight it is hard for you to lead a normal life. What do you do in your free time?

R.P. In a way, work has become my best refuge. Although it might sound ridiculous, as soon as I have some free time I read scripts. I feel a little frustrated for not having gone to college, so I try desperately to educate myself. I have brought with me to Vancouver about 100 books, I have them all spread all over the hotel room.

EP3. I’m afraid it is going to be very hard for you to separate yourself from the vampire Edward. What would the perfect part be to help you achieve that?

R.P. Dude, if you find out, let me know [laughs].Nothing that has to do with blood, I hope.

EP3. I have read that a masochistic narcissism drives you to read everything that is written about yourself. How often do you google your name?

R.P. Oh, you have read that in the interview for the April American GQ, right? Dude, I was kidding. It sounded like a total loser and thought it would be funny to say that.

EP3. You should know by now that everything you say is news.

R.P. Yes, but it’s very weird. And it can be very annoying because I have to apologize a lot for things I say without thinking them through. I have hopes that if I keep contradicting myself all the time, anything I say will ever be news again [laughs].I have a big mouth, I know.

EP3. Is there anything that you have read about yourself that has particularly annoyed you?

R.P. Hmm… A few days ago my mother sent me an email, she was very worried because apparently I had bumped my head with a post on the set of New Moon and was left unconscious. And that without even having shot a single scene [at the moment of this interview], I haven’t even been on set!

EP3. The last thing I have heard is that someone from the set has said that you, literally, stink.

R.P. [He laughs hard] Yea, I’ve heard about that. The funny thing is that these things always come from “anonymous sources”. I just got to Vancouver! I must really stink because the set is 25 kilometers away from my hotel and I haven’t even been out of my room.

EP3. You also said that you don’t feel like having a girlfriend in this crazy environment of fame. Have you found someone to make you change your mind?

R.P. Oh, no [laughs]. I remember when I was filming Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, where I had a very small part, and everybody was commenting about my girlfriend at the time. It is very stressful for them. You have to become very secretive about it,

EP3. With Camilla Belle [lead actress of 10.000 B.C.] you lived a real persecution by the media

R.P. Yes, but it was different with her. She was just a friend. We were laughing about it. The thing is: If she is not your girlfriend, then it’s OK, but if she is, then it turns into a nightmare, everybody wants to know what you are doing.

EP3. Has someone already harassed you?

R.P. You are not going to believe it, but the last time someone harassed me was while I was shooting Little Ashes, in Barcelona. There was a girl who waited for me at the door of the house every day. The truth is that she was really nice, completely normal, but it all felt very odd. I don’t know what has been of her. Or maybe she just lived there and it all was in my imagination!

EP3. Let’s say that you have an eight weeks holiday starting today, what would you do?

R.P. I want to travel! That’s why I try to find jobs in different countries. I think that early next year I will be working in Paris for 3 months.

EP3. On what Project?

R.P. Oh, I think I’m being a big mouth once again…Who cares. It’s for an adaptation of Guy de Maupassant’s Bel-Ami. Now that I have told you I guess I can tell everybody else. I’m tired of hearing: “Ag, you are only on the Twilight movies, you are nothing but a shooting star”. I refuse that! [Laughs]

EP3. That way you will really earn the right to sit on the second row at the Oscars, like you did this year…

R.P. Dude, I was so embarrassed. I have never felt so unworthy of anything in my life. What was I doing there when I only had been part in a movie that would never be nominated for anything by the Academy?